"Your uncle molests Collies."

"Would you like a drink? Tunacolada?"

"This is not Nam, this is bowling, there are rules."

"It's down there somewhere, let me take another look."

"I got dat wood right here!"

"We need to internalize this idea of excellence. Not many folks spend a lot of time trying to be excellent."

"Don't stop believing."

"Have a GREAT Day!"

"If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves."

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. "

" You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body."

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. "

"Eros will have naked bodies; Friendship naked personalities."

"Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important. "

"Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither. "

"A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell. "

"The future will be better tomorrow."

"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history."

"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice-president, and that one word is 'to be prepared'."

"It's a question of whether we're going to go forward into the future, or past to the back."

"If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check."

"I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman."

"I understand the importance of bondage between parent and child."

"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."

"I have made good judgements in the past. I have made good judgements in the future."

"Any of you boys seen an aircraft-carrier around here?"

"Do work, son."

"You're so beautiful...you could be a waitress."

"Let me tell you bout stylin. The perfect A-frame wave spittin water in your face. I call it 'liquid draino, wannabe bullwinkle', I tell you no LIES, my friends. It's a consciousness raiser. "

"You girls mind if I take my shirt off?"

"There are some things so serious you have to laugh at them."

"Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true."

"The opposite of a trivial truth is trivially false; the opposite of a great truth is a great truth."

"Screw you guys I'm going home."

"I went to college four years. Only thing I learned - Never trust a hooker with a walkie-talkie."

"Here's to swimmin' with bow-legged women."

"And, you know, the thing about a shark... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. "

"Sometimes, getting up in the morning and brushing your teeth is the hardest part of the day."

"Fear is the foundation of most governments."

"Great is the guilt of an unnecessary war."

"Remember, democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There is never a democracy that did not commit suicide."

"Abuse of words has been the great instrument of sophistry and chicanery, of party, faction, and division of society."