James Taylor

ncthom    

Musical Legend and All-around Cool Guy

Went Bald and Managed to Keep His Magnatism

Divorced Carly Simon and Remain Cool

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Randy Marsh

flies666    

Randy is shown to be South Park's only geologist

Randy is often the leader

Randy has a drinking problem

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt

moc    

Nursery Rhyme Legend

Whenever we go out, the people always shout

His name is my name too

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Sasha Vujacic

anonymous    

The Machine

He plays for the Los Angeles Lakers of the NBA

He shoots like hot sizzle

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Bob Nelson

wtfitseamon    

Former NFL Nose Tackle

Unstoppable in the video game Tecmo Super Bowl

Did nothing particularly noteworthy in his career

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Kordell Stewart

wtfitseamon    

Former NFL player for 3 teams

Known as "Slash" as he played QBRBWRP!

Was part of the "Miracle at Michigan"

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Mario Williams

anonymous    

Houston Texans DE

2006 NFL 1st Overall Pick

14 Sacks in the 2007 season

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Niko Bellic

WTFitsEamon    

Protagonist of Grand Theft Auto IV

Killed people, smuggled people, and sold people

Makes a living out of stealing and carjacking

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Rod Woodson

WTFitsEamon    

Former NFL CB

Came back from reconstructive knee surgery in 1995

Career interceptions: 71

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Ki-Jana Carter

WTFitsEamon    

Former NFL RB

Tore his knee in his first ever NFL preseason game

Ended up being a major bust

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